Sunday 29 July 2012

gharig il ghargaan akthar

today's lesson is in compassion
energy happiness vampires
drowners want to drown others with them, to lift them back up

dear god- send me inspiration from the heavens above, within, and around as one
when the going gets tough the tough gets going
when the theme is compassion then learn to forgive
easier said than done she said
entertaining the thought of one of the many mirrors of the universe's reflection, reflecting back to her her state of delirium, upset, inner chaos and confusion
step back she said
step into the eyes of the observer and experience true vision
how can i she replied when i have tied up all my thoughts with feelings of rage, fear, guilt and anger.
i am afraid she said. i am afraid he will hurt me back with his harsh words and expose my dirty laundry.
but isn't your 'dirty laundry' just as bad as others' dirty laundry- on a varying level
looking at it from a different angle, stepping into another's shoe, i see what she means
i come to accept that one man's treasure is another man's tragedy, pain...when its in my power and capacity to choose how to look at this situation, I now choose compassion.
dear mama, please do not be upset and affected by their harsh words, they are drowning so fast and so deep so early into their marriage
both husband and wife keep plucking each others feather's off
both drowning in desperate need for air, in an attempt for salvation and survival
in a universe of infinite possibilities, the possibility of looking at the flip side seems so well and dandy until yu6fa7 il kayl
of course i am gonna want to believe 'my reality' it fits so perfectly well with my brain's created mold of  reality or my illusion of reality.
step aside
call the ego out
not everyone loves jesus, mohammed, ghandi, buddha, krishna....
one hero, many faces....
now breathe and remember that all these faces are but a mirror reflection exposing a weed so deeply rooted in your mind, desperately in need of forgiveness (for choosing to go along with the painful thoughts) and compassion (remembering the ra7mah)
the weed is sinking deep into the poisonous dark waters of despair, 'i need oxygen, i need the breath of life. i need the breath of god's compassionate love. heal me please.
what context do you look at it
ok i made a mistake i went with along with temptation, the beautiful lure of distraction glorified to me, painted out to me ib il wiswas baaya3 il7achy
take one bite of the apple, i promise you it tastes soooooooooooooooo good. just one small bite one teeny weeny bite, just one... i promise you its a whole lot more entertaining
i am NOT going to fall into the trap of temptation
the ride to hell
i'd so much rather be in the 'calm' bliss of 'ignorance' than be in the 'fast' paced life/moments of hell thoughts with the devil's torture, taking me back to revisit every single dark nook of my past in an attempt to connect the pieces of the 'dark puzzle' together to create a dark tapestry of life.
STOP
put a halt to the crap
hit the breaks real hard
i love you
i trust you
you are the light of god
dont fall for the devil's temptation
i ove you


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